Let’s be real, moving to a new place can sometimes be scary.
What I mean by scary is not knowing anyone or where anything is. That’s scary to me. The unknown. But what makes me uncomfortable can only make me stronger, right?
You may have got the impression that I’m an outgoing kind of gal but the truth is, I have feelings too. I get nervous meeting new people, have turned around and chickened out attending parties, I have even felt my heart in my throat just walking into a room. But I have forced myself to get out of my comfortable zone and experience newness. I need a change and that means, making a change.
Since moving in July, I have met some amazing people and already made close friendships. When things are right, they just line up like that and I truly feel blessed.
I have always enjoyed the connection a community brings together, the friendships that can be made, and meeting like-minded people. Have you ever felt like you are the only one in the world that cares about the things you do? I surely have and still do to an extent.
For me, health and food have always been an important part of my life, yet I have just rediscovered it again. I vividly remember sitting at my mom’s dinner table and eating my stepfather’s famous meatballs and spaghetti. I lifted my fork and thought, it didn’t feel right eating that meatball. I don’t know how else to say it. I think I was connecting with my inner-self, my soul and discovered I had resistance to my choice. After that moment, I became vegetarian for almost a decade.
When I became pregnant, my body craved meat. I had a hamburger everyday with Rita’s Italian Ice. My vegetarian days were through.
However looking back, I wasn’t a very good vegetarian. My diet consist of approved beer and shots, boxes of mac n cheese, grilled cheese and roman noodles. I was living in apartments and darn broke. I moved out the day I turned 18 and settled for a retail job making minimum wage. I took on life when I wasn’t ready but curious to what it had to offer.
I went to my first Vegan Potluck last night. I say first because I will be back over and over. I made connections with the same like-minded people I have been looking for. Yeah – they are out there. 🙂 Woo hoo! I had an amazing experience that I can’t wait to share with you, but then it started me to think – what am I.
This is what I know to be true:
You have to be honest with yourself. Really think about if the choice you are making feels right to you. Do you feel good eating ice cream? Four pieces of pizza? Chicken? Soda? Whatever it may be… If you listen to yourself, you will know the truth. It takes some time just being quiet.
I have tried to define my eating habits for years. What am I? Am I vegetarian, meatatarian (I joke), gluten-free, paleo or even vegan? Making my life fit into a category has been daunting. When speaking with a lady at the potluck, she said, “Some people come here vegan, some vegetarians, some 80/20, some 90/10.” The light bulb went off. I can work with that. I can be 90/10. It’s not a specific category and I like that. From here, if my thoughts shift to being vegetarian great, if not, no worries. I’m exploring.
My chapter of discovery is not over but always continuing. I love to explore. I love to eat but most importantly I love to be healthy and live.
Hi Amber. I found your blog! I love that quote about the small group making a difference. We certainly are trying. Glad to hear you will be back over and over. We need more young people in the group.
This really hits home for me right now, but on a different level. I am definitely a meat eater. I tried going vegetarian in my college years, but dealing with extremist vegans on the outskirts of my circles forced me to say “I don’t want to be like that,” and I started eating meat again. I don’t eat a lot–I’d probably fall into the 80/20 category–but I do eat it, and my experiences with vegetarians and vegans has been less than uplifting.
But my different level of discovering myself comes more on a spiritual level. It stared with my herbs, and developing a deep passion for learning ALL their uses, including medical. Which lead me back to things I’d looked into previously. Namely paganism. But being a Christian raised and taught, that brings major conflicts into my life. I am just beginning to make changes personally, and the readings I’m doing have been wonderful in relieving some of my fears: I can be a Pagan Christian. This is huge to me.
Thank you for sharing your heart on something so personal.
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